Sex Magic 101

Updated: Mar 3, 2020


Artwork by Toni Greis



According to Wikipedia, Sex Magic is formally defined as “any type of sexual activity used in magical, ritualistic, or otherwise spiritual pursuits”. We all get aroused from time to time but, if you knew you could harness that arousal to produce your dream life-or at the very least-check off items on your to do list would you? As a ritual practitioner, herbalist, and intuitive tarot reader, I am often surrounded by women who know how to use what they’re working with (femininity, sensuality, and self awareness) to get what they want, and what they deserve. I caught up with two of these Goddesses CJ Kaine of @EcstasyMagic on Twitter and Ora, aka @theheadwrapbaby (also

on Twitter) to learn more about their practice, their prowess, and the purpose of Sex Magic.

WDA: Ladies, Tell me a little bit about who you are, and what’s the foundation of your spiritual practices?

CJ: I practice magic and read tarot to provide guidance, with assistance from the divine, to propel others into living in and up to their greatest purposes and manifesting their desires using every day exercises and sexual energy.

Ora: My practice is the use of sexual energy to manifest my [personal] desires while deepening my understanding of feminine energy.

WDA: Were you guys always into alternative spirituality? If not, what led you to your spiritual understanding/path?:

Ora: “I was raised in the Baptist Church, however I stopped recognizing myself as Christian in 2014. I deeply respect the Abrahamic beliefs, but African spirituality has become more comfortable for me.

CJ: I was blessed to grow up with the knowledge of religion but the freedom of not having to practice organized religion. As a child I resented that absence of structure because most of my family had strict beliefs and unwavering devotion to Catholicism. I questioned inconsistencies that I witnessed in churches or what I found contradictory and that’s just something extremely taboo in the black community. It wasn’t until adulthood that I appreciated what as a child, I had assumed was confusion or ignorance. This fluidity allowed for less “unlearning” to do as I searched for spiritual answers that resonated with me.

WDA: When did you all first realize sex held actual, tangible power?

Ora: My first orgasm with myself (laughing). All jokes aside, everything sexually that was pleasurable, nobody did to me; I did to myself. I figured very early the power that resided inside of me which was a blessing because sexuality was so misguided with fear, judgement, trauma etc that I spiritually blocked myself from FEELING. Feeling pleasure, feeling safe, feeling beautiful and free when I’m ‘plugged in’ with another soul was such a forbidden fruit for women. My friends and family unknowingly showed me how sexual power didn’t belong to women. That disturbed me on every level, I questioned why and ran into countless of energies who felt the same and treated me as such. I wanted my energy back, so I began to cultivate it via masturbation, isolation and healthy independence. Concerning my sexuality, I knew my sexuality was going to be a path to teach me wisdom, sensuality and true love for self. My power will never rest in the hands nor the bed of another. With further self understanding, I came back home to me to become a soft invitation of everything needed in this world.

CJ:”I realized how powerful sexuality is when I was able to manifest opportunities, that I’d struggled with bringing into existence for years, within days. When you orgasm, you lose all control over your body...As your body releases endorphins, no matter what was on your mind before, you feel euphoric in that moment. Your mind is quiet for as long as the orgasm lasts. Realizing that if I have the power to bring forth that type of energy, helped me recognize just how powerful we are as humans. Now imagine using that power with intent for your benefit.

WDA: So how have you two been able to incorporate that knowledge of sexual energy into work as Spiritual Practitioners?:

CJ: Sex magic has become a huge part of my practice! I weave magic into the most mundane activities like cooking and dancing so of course I use sexual energy as a powerful catalyst for transmutation...Most of my clients first came to me for what they call “Cock Readings” which started off partly as a joke [from] when I asked twitter if anyone wanted me to pull tarot cards on how they could manifest the “cock you deserve.” During readings, I began to get channeled messages about intimate sexual details so I went with it. I started receiving positive feed- back from clients and it took off.This reading is for anyone who wants to manifest the sexual partner of their dreams. (This reading isn’t limited to people who like dick or even people who are sexually active as I have done readings for virgins and people practicing celibacy. It applies for whatever body parts they prefer.) I’ve also done this reading for quite a few couples who either wanted to heal and move forward from past situations, reconnect sexually, or just enjoy a healthy sexual relationship. There are 3 major parts to the CYD reading. The most important part is the energy surrounding what work needs to be done by the asker in order to ascend their own energy. Then the second and third parts are the energy surrounding this partner and the dirty “between the sheets” details.

Ora: For me, many of my clients are battling toxic relationships, struggling with self love and getting back to their core being of femininity and are looking for detachment from toxicity. I also advise women and men on holistic yoni health. This may or may not be strange, but I have [alot of] Male clientele that seek guidance to understand their partner better and love them more intuitively.

WDA: So how do people get started? What are your tips on how to use sex magic at home?

Ora: "Conscious visualization, the same method I practice in meditation because we tend to drift away from the present. I treat sex magick as a three-part act. First visualization, cleansed and safe environment, then actual act of creating the energy. Best exercise for partners? Yoga!! Any cardio workout that gets your blood pumping to get that happy hormones poppin. Partner assisted exercises are my absolute favorite because it builds trust. Women need to feel safe and her partner needs to feel safe to be that security she needs." 

CJ: "The perfect exercise for beginners is to start with visualization during solo play. During the “build up” and getting turned on, visualize what you want. While you’re riding that high during your release, visualize yourself actually having the thing you want. The most powerful time is after you’ve released, while you’re coming down, use that euphoria to feel happy that you’ve achieved that result. Also, A lot of people know sex magic is used for manifestation or binding but it can also be used for healing rituals. An extremely powerful exercise for couples would be speaking affirmations while cumming. This can work via mutual masturbation or whatever is considered sex to both partners. During foreplay, you’re both putting intent into the “work” you’re putting in by speaking these affirmations or intentions to each other. Repeating them back and forth. It’s one partner’s responsibility to keep the other focused. Whichever partner is in control will speak an affirmation (for example: I am healed) to which the other will repeat back, “I am healed” then “you are healed” “we are healed.”

WDA: Amazing Ladies. Last question, where can people find you and at what point in their manifestation journey should they seek you out?

CJ:  I'm @CJ_kaine on Twitter  and my biz account is @ecstasymagic; Some of my clients are new to the idea of manifestation and some are powerful manifestors,  but their manifestations aren’t of the caliber they’d like to have long term or they don’t stick. So sometimes it’s best that we start at the very beginning anyway. There’s always a possibility that there’s some unlearning to be done or sometimes they don’t think they deserve the best so they manifest of desperation. A common issue I address is manifesting partners out of loneliness. That type of energy won’t get you that Ascended Dick or Ascended Pussy (which is my specialty)."

Ora: I'm @theheadwrapbaby on Twitter...I always say it's divine timing. When Spirit leads you to me, that's when your ready..."

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